6 February, 2019 14:59

I read for nurses all over the world. Many of whom would rather be working here in Ireland. I read for exhausted student nurses who are put under unbelievable pressure & left in compromising situations because of the staffing crisis. Some of my clients fly back to Ireland on the weekends from working in the UK, as they have no other choice to make a basic wage. Having spent time in hospital last year, being admitted through a&e, I saw the absolute diabolical conditions they face. All the time being professional & courteous.
I had my bloods taken at a waiting area for visitors with people walking by, all the while the kind nurse was reassuring & apologizing for the lack of privacy.
I saw scared faces on trolleys, tempers flaring in frustration & nurses doing their goddamn best to treat patients.
I came away from my hospital stay with such a renewed respect for them. I witnessed true grace under fire.
As a citizen of this country I stand alongside the nurses of this country. I fully support pay parity. The government has to wake up and recognize we are haemorrhaging our resources to other countries. To all the nurses reading this, I think you are wonderful. Thank you for being there for me in my time of need & I’m here for you now…

©️Fiona Ní Mhuirri

By Fiona Faery

5 February, 2019 10:33

This one is for all the mediums on the Book of Face.

It’s so easy to get burnt out. To feel a weariness so deep in your bones you wonder, was your guardian angel drinking the day you designed your soul chart!
We work in an unregulated industry. Where any Tom, Dick or Harry can buy a deck of Angel cards & set themselves up as a 7th son of a 7th son…..we’ve all heard the nightmarish stories.
Not only does the genuine developing medium have to work through their own self-doubt, whilst trying to strengthen their connection to spirit; They face criticism from their own peers. I actively avoid cliques.
Every week clients sit in front of me sharing their “fortune teller” experiences (it’s probably why I hate the term so much)!
Then you have the those that outright condemn psychics, tarring us with the same brush.
There are those that patronise, saying, we may mean well but are mentally unwell as what we do simply cannot & does not exist.

“For those who believe, no proof is necessary, for those who do not, none is ever enough!”

Then you have the perils of working in an unregulated industry. I have worked at fairs in the past, where I heard readers offering to lift curses, attachments & undercut other readers fees. I’ve seen stand off rows between readers over issues too petty to post here.

The ego will trick you at every corner. I’ve witnessed fantastic mediums torn to shreds as a result of jealousy. I’ve been accused of having entities attached to me (There’s no way she’s that busy -she’s made a deal with the devil- I kid you not!)
I’ve had so much treachery come from my ‘own kind’ it’s laughable.

As our mediumship evolves via online readings- technology also opens new portals to destroy ones reputation. Trolls posing as dissatisfied clients- other frauds wishing to take -out another reader -take to forums & Facebook – judge & jury rolled into one- it would sicken the strongest stomach.
If you’re reading this and you’re weary. Wondering where the hell is spirit in all of this? Thinking -why have I put myself up for such criticism in front of friends,family & the outside world only to find out that I’ve more to bloody worry about on the inside!
If you’re reading this and you’re just off the phone bitching about your colleagues- YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM! It might feel so delicious having a gossip, feeling superior to another. All this in the name of spirit…..
Do you truly understand Karma?
As it understands you perfectly.

I have the novel exception of having a degree in Marketing- which keeps me very grounded. I do not suffer fools. I’m a friendly person but will not abide insincerity in any shape or form. Most two-faced gossips tend to shrivel in my presence or run in the opposite direction as I’ve no problem speaking my truth. Thing is, I wasn’t always like this!

I entered this industry in my early twenties. I was so naive. I thought that being a spiritual person meant = you were a good kind honest person. Wow I was so wrong. Being spiritual is bloody tough. You are schooled in life & the only way to do this is through experience. You must have your heart broken, you must feel the sting of betrayal- you must forsake all in the name of integrity. The path to enlightenment is littered with broken bodies. Wounded souls who have given up. Who no longer have the confidence – faith or motivation to keep on swimming.
So they tread water. If they swim into your slip stream it will be very hard to shake them, for they will have knowledge & experience you desire, but as soon as you begin to find your strength they will remind you of your shortcomings. Tell you of other stronger swimmers, make you doubt your abilities. When you finally break away from them, you are adrift, confused? How did I let this person influence my opinions? Why did I give my power over so readily?
This person may also influence many others so you may even find yourself ostracised from an entire community.

Support is invaluable to the developing & advanced medium. Whether you’re an emotive clairsentient or straight from the hip-shooting claircoginent – having other mediums to support your growth and bounce dreams, symbols, signs off, can be incredibly helpful.

Jealousy is rife within this industry. Once you accept that & learn to check yourself when you feel you are being petty you won’t go too far wrong. I’ve sat in the presence of famous mediums who have muddied the names of other well known mediums for the most petty of reasons. I’ve always told my students, the ego will tell you that you are shit or shit-hot! It will catch you where you are most vulnerable and feed off that. The most common feeling is that of inadequacy. I’m not good enough! Brilliant- the ego will keep you in the corner afraid to draw any attention to your beautiful heart . Watch your thoughts – they become intentions- your intentions become reality.
So, if you feel you’re not good enough, you will unwittingly set off a chain reaction of events & circumstances into your life TO VALIDATE YOUR NEGATIVE MINDSET.
Now on to the other breed- the shit hots. These ones get off by putting other mediums down. They’ve done every course their is to do-normally on first name terms with all the greats and love to tell you where you are going wrong in your mediumship, as a matter of fact will tell everyone where you’re going wrong. Sad thing is, these ones tend to have pretty strong personalities and it’s just easier to sit there and let them bitch & assassinate another’s reputation as long as they leave you alone….right? WRONG.
You’re compliance ensures their dominance. You may as well bad mouth the individual as well. Silence is the cowards weapon of choice.
Remove yourself from the company of such individual/s. If you feel you can’t truly express yourself for fear of being judged- it’s very wrong for you to be around folks you don’t trust!
I get told- “but Fiona, you don’t understand- there’s no where else teaching this course or no-one else that shares my interests” So what? You stay in a destructive cycle with psychic bullies? WTF!!!

Has it ever occurred to you- that spirit are waving big massive red flags at you – trying to get you to move the hell on- but you’re too busy being a martyr to the cause you can’t see the writing on the wall….!

There will always be people in this life who won’t like you. Deal with it. This need to be liked & accepted is natural , but if you are truly to advance & listen to your soul’s guidance- you are going to piss people off- period!

Stop trying to fit it- you don’t! You were born with distinctive abilities to help people who are wrestling with the darkness of bereavement. You have been sent to punch a hole through grief. To give hope where all is lost. To remind someone of how powerful they can be. In order to do this you must shine your own light. Follow your own heart. Trust- trust- trust that you shall never be led astray. You will meet some wonderful magical people- you will also meet some very messed up bat-shit crazy people too. Always remember if you follow your own truth you won’t go far wrong.
We all come here to work through karma from various life-times whilst simultaneously incurring karma In the present. Be aware of your actions. None of us are perfect. You can take a massive leap forward In your own development by being aware of your own words. All words carry energy. They carry needles of poison or are ampules of encouragement. You and you alone control what comes out of your mouth. You didn’t chose this path – it chose you…..
Start to see the signs- recognise the beauty & eloquence of spirit. Stop caring so much about what people think & just do it!
Failure is a natural part of life. There is always a lesson behind the pain. The trick here is to get past the pain and not allow it to hinder you or taint your vision to what lies beyond.

So much greatness awaits. The joy of blending your soul with spirit. The honor it is to be present when the light comes back into a persons eyes & you know their soul has re-ignited once more. This is what you were born to do.
Now get over yourself and DO IT!

(C) Fiona Ní Mhuirri

By Fiona Faery

29 January, 2019 10:33

I adore teaching. There is no greater joy then seeing a person begin to understand their Mediumship ability and begin their journey of development in earnest.
I’m always asked about the level of experience needed to do a beginners level. The simple answer is…none!
In truth the natural medium will always have had a sense around certain events in their lives. Recurring dreams, prophetic dreaming, seeing loved ones in spirit would’ve been part of their past. Society teaches us to repress this information and the individual never learns how to access their abilities. For some, certain life events can trigger an awakening of their abilities. My method of teaching is through laughter, repetition & patience!
The novice medium has usually spent a life time of being self critical. My 5 month course aims to build confidence within yourself and trusting your developing abilities.
You will also be joined on your journey by a handful of like-minded individuals. Privacy is sacred & what is shared within the sacred circle stays there.
There are assignments to be completed each month. Usually on an aspect of Mediumship, to further your education in this area.
I’ve lost count the amount of times students have felt they never fitted in anywhere, only to feel a sense of connection as they finally realized their potential.
Mediumship is a journey of the soul. It is a journey of unfolding & understanding. Above all, realizing how connected we truly are.

My next beginners course commences on Sunday 10th of February at the Carnbeg Hotel, Dundalk. Intermediate level commences in Sligo in March.

If interested or know anyone that is, please send email to fiona@fionafaery.ie for more information!

By Fiona Faery

24 January, 2019 12:11

An open letter to Doreen Virtue

Hi Doreen,

As a young teenager I would call over to my best friend’s house. She shared a room with her big sisters. One of which had a deck of animal Medicine cards under her bed. When she would be out, we would take it in turns to read each other’s cards. The bedroom smelled of incense & had hand painted Louise L. Hay affirmations surrounding the mirror. I loved lazy Saturday afternoons, lying on that bedroom floor ruminating on the various meanings….When Hughes & Hughes opened in the jervis street centre,(in Dublin. Ireland) it was the first time I sneaked out of school to buy that same deck. I still have that same animal medicine deck today.
The book still smells of coconut candles & it feels like an old friend when I begin to shuffle the cards.

Many years later, the hay house phenomenon that was Doreen Virtue rolled into town. Back then I was a single mum on lone parent’s allowance. Every penny I had was precious & like all us mothers any spare money I had, I spent on my baby. Family & friends would treat me to a deck of Doreen Virtue’s Angel cards.
A friend of mine even surprised me with a seminar with You back in the last boom years. Tickets were €150 for the afternoon. I stress it was not a course, no refreshments were provided. When we arrived at the R.D.S. The full extent of the hay house marketing wheel was evident. Wall to wall vendors selling hundreds of Doreen Virtue, Books, cds, magnets, cards. Anything you could stick an angel on it was there!
I begun to become disenchanted & disillusioned with you Ms. Virtue. At your peak, a 2 day experience swimming with Dolphins & Yourself was $1000, that by the way didn’t include flights etc.
I found your books becoming repetitive, telling the same car jacking story, the re-telling of the same experiences.
At this point your decks kept coming. I have my favorites, Healing with the angels deck & Healing with the faeries deck were the decks I began reading for the general public with.

I’ve followed Your career, your divorces, a brief spell in a new age rock group, your entanglement with the I.R.S. , one massive alimony settlement with Steven Farmer,
Your new found faith etc.
Then came the announcement….
Following a meeting with Reid Tracey of Hay house, of whom you’ve been a massive cash cow for nearly 20 years. You were renouncing the very thing you had singlehandedly made popular culture….Angel Cards!
Not only were you renouncing the cards, you also wanted various publications taken off shelves & never reprinted. (Angels & Ascended masters being a major thorn in your evangelical side).
Today you went a step further….
Following your revelations with Christ you’ve published a list (how helpful!), of all the evil new age practices that are in league with the devil.
It is Official.
Doreen Virtue you have gone batshit…
Full metal jacket bible bashing bananas…..
You need to be called out on your hypocritical bullshit. The amount of times I had to read about your special relationship with Archangel Michael and how he always fixed your car issues or computer problems..so now that was Satan… ahhhh I’m with you now Doreen…
Actually, Jesus take the wheel!

Let me get this straight, you made millions from the Angels & your “divine” connection with them. You lost millions because you weren’t honest with the tax man, made bad choices with husbands & your money,
then you found Jesus ….(that’s a pretty lucrative Bible Belt) and now those of us who spent hundreds, if not thousands on your courses & merchandise were misled by you?
Or was that Satan again? I’m finding it very hard right now to separate you both, ironically.
Any solicitors on Social media here…feel like taking a collective lawsuit? To stop this manipulative woman from ever inflicting her wretchedness on the general public ever again.

Here’s the thing Doreen!
I’m happy you found the Jesus that works for you, for now. I couldn’t care less if you dance naked on your lawn wearing a Tin foil hat to protect you from all the evil energy those pissed off angels must be sending you, I wouldn’t even be surprised if Hay house has a dart board with your face pinned to it for the public relations nightmare you are causing them.
They are big corporate boys, there’re going to be ok.
However I’m seriously disgusted by your attempts to denegrate & destroy the holistic community. Beautiful treatments such as reiki, crystals , angel readings (unbelievable…..). You have said are in league with the devil.
I cannot fathom this.
I’m a medium. I’m also a psychic.
The connections I’ve made with spirit have always been loving. As spirit is pure love. In the end we pass into a consciousness of pure unconditional LOVE.
My guidance has always been ethical & always for a persons highest good.
I always found you however superficial. Your expression love & light, I made my own! I used to call the spiritual snobs the love & shight brigade. You were one of those that spouted rainbows & cupcakes.
Now all of a sudden your acknowledging the world has a dark side?
I’ve news for you Doreen.
This is Hell.
We have to live in this world of paedophophiles, rapists & murderers. They are wars & famines. Narcissistic world leaders. They are parasites whose entire purpose is to burrow into the eyes of a child to render them blind.
There is disease & sickness, heartbreak & betrayal.
We learn the lessons and we go home.
You & I believe in a completely different god.
Real spirituality is ugly. For it is only when you are in a dark place can you really appreciate the light.
Life is shadow & light. I won’t live my life terrified of an omnipotent all powerful god who condemns Me on my sexuality, morality or otherwise.
Nor will I have some so called “spiritual” person give me guidelines (with love of course..) of what I can & can’t believe in, when you’ve spent the last 20 years prostituiting every last cent you could get your greedy paws on off the backs of your fallen angels.
I’m aware of your charitable donations as your god scares the shit out of me. There must be a roasting pit waiting for you after all the hard graft you’ve put in for Old Nick.

Lastly, I’ve news for you Doreen.
People are waking up to this bullshit. I will always be grateful for the channel you facilitated through your “spiritual growth”, but now like your beliefs you are now redundant.

Love & light 😳
Just kidding…Go fuck yourself! (That was Satan….my bad!)

Fiona Ní Mhuirri

Sent from my iPad

By Fiona Faery

16 January, 2019 09:43

I found myself speaking about forgiveness the other day.
The funny thing about betrayal is, that unless you deal with the emotional pain that follows, Your body absorbs it. Years can go by & the very mention of your betrayers’ name can flare the anger from the depths of hell within you. Triggered is an understatement!
The path to forgiveness is different for all of us. What works for me may not work for you, but I do feel we all agree that time can give us a perspective on life events.
Death can Make us face sobering truths about ourselves & others that beforehand we may have denied.
The real truth about forgiveness is that ultimately you are freeing yourself. You are no longer defined by the event or have your spirit destroyed by another’s indifference to your suffering.
For me personally, I’m at a place where I’m grateful for nearly every single nasty person I’ve encountered. I know now they were teachers. Each lesson revealed itself in many different ways, sometimes taking me years to understand. It was only when I stopped trying to think why such a thing was done or what was that person thinking when they betrayed me etc , that I realized I was attached to their perspective of the situation.

I knew on a higher soul level my soul contract with that person was to teach me lessons on courage , loyalty, patience , boundaries etc.
I began to realize the control past events had on me, how future relationships/ friendships were stained with cynicism. I began to spot familiar patterns play out with the people I attracted into my life. You guessed it….same crap, different day!
I started to look inward instead of outward for the answers. How I could’ve been kinder to myself, instead of beating myself up for not leaving sooner or putting up with shitty friends for so long. As I began to be kinder to myself, a strange thing happened…I found it easier to spot the users! I found it easier to say no, hence filtering the frenemies even quicker! In order to move on, I accepted apologies I never received. I acknowledged the impact the person had on my life, grasped the lesson to my chest and got the hell out off that self imposed purgatory of regret!
I’m grateful for the lessons I’ve been taught, because of them I’m a kinder and much more tolerant person. I get teased about my tolerance with various personalities, but in truth I can spot someone struggling.
In terms of the teachers, Beforehand I would’ve dismissed this person as arrogant or manipulative , now I see them locked in a battle with their ego, punishing themselves hard for the slightest failing…these people are exhausted emotionally & can come across as sharp, rude etc.
They are here to learn lessons too, but sadly in a lot of their cases the ego wins out being fully in the driving seat for most of their lives.
Don’t let yourself be defined by another’s carelessness. Don’t let victimhood ensnare you with it’s martyred talons.
Talk, release the poison from every cell in your body. You may not of had a choice in what happened to you, but you certainly have the power to choose the ending in this chapter. You get to choose what defines you. No one is you and that’s your strength too…

©️Fiona Ní Mhuirri

By Fiona Faery

9 January, 2019 11:52

Each year brings lessons.
People come and go.
Loved ones pass to spirit.
Betrayal could’ve visited you
Debt may have found you
A lover may have left you,
Your health may have
questioned you?
Look back on the year that was and look for the gifts hindsight has brought you…
You may be grateful for the gift of patience. You may have seen those who truly have your back, as well as those who are toxic to your physical & mental health.
You may have lost faith and found your resolve. The gift of reality and common sense can be a blessing when it comes to making tough decisions. You may have had to make a very tough call and taken the consequences that came with it. The strength of spirit that ignited within you was your inner strength stepping forward.
You may have learnt the value of having one good friend by your side. Loyalty indeed is one of the true virtues but only when it is reciprocated in kind. As loyalty in the wrong company can get you killed. As the bells toll on New Year’s Eve, put away the weighing scales, be grateful
You get to see in a new year while another has taken their last breath. The gift of aging is not given to everyone so stop rallying against it and embrace every line, wrinkle & stretch mark. If you’re being careless with your health, ask yourself why?
For beneath your self destructive behaviour you are crying out to be seen & loved.
It is imperative you see yourself as lovable and know how worthy you are of being loved.
Money is a by product of happiness. When we look after ourselves, rest, nurture & nourish our spirits. We are able to look after those around us with enthusiasm and our natural proclivity to abundance flows. When we become trapped in a stagnant thought pattern and systemic mindset we adopt a victim mentality or feel we are not worthy of good things happening. You are worthy of having good things happen to you.
When was the last time you laughed so hard no sound came out? Can you remember? Allow the joy of that memory to fill
You up, as it will shield you in unexpected times of hardship. Make plans this coming year for moments with people who make you laugh. Dance.
Music reaches the soul. Have you ever noticed how children need very little encouragement to dance?
How singing out loud in your car can totally change your mood after a tough day. Make a playlist of your favourite songs and have them ready when you need them to lift you. I’ve given up count at how many times I’ve been caught chair dancing at traffic lights….

Above all be kind to yourself.
Learn from the past and do not allow yourself to carry it into the coming year. The lesson has been learned and it’s time to turn the page on a brand new chapter in your life. Onward….

©️Fiona Ní Mhuirri

By Fiona Faery

2 January, 2019 15:57

There is a lecherous group of people that prey on the innate kindness of others. They are drawn to seek out the sweetest, nicest individuals. Usually the people they are drawn to are codependent/ have codependent traits, have issues setting boundaries etc.
Did you know 1 in 25 people are sociopaths. Sociopaths thrive on manipulating people. Obliging individuals are used as disposable pawns for their bidding.
They detest people who have boundaries, opting to seek out kind helpful souls who will carry out their conditional demands unconditionally!!!!
How do you know you have a sociopath in your life? They thrive on drama, often have no regard for rules or societal norms. Will change relationships / friendship groups quite often as they can’t keep
Up the illusion for very long. They are manipulators & liars, throwing anyone under the bus so they don’t have to accept responsibility for their callous actions. A sociopath has a high retention for obtaining emotional data & will happily research their subjects, perusing their Facebook pages, social media to gain as much knowledge as possible on their subject. They possess an uncanny likeability & charm. You simply can’t help liking them, even though they seem to land themselves in situations most of us would never find ourselves in. The other aspect here is that they have a complete lack of regard to your personal safety etc as they can be irrational & spontaneous. The sociopath can’t for the life of themselves plan ahead. Unless that is of course, they have people around them they can manipulate to do this!
There is never a dull moment with these individuals. They are great storytellers & they bring the p to a party. Being around them the world feels brighter. If you suffer from low self esteem & don’t like attention on you, it’s crack cocaine for them. They have a captive audience & the focus is on them. They will help you if they have an agenda. They will have no problem reminding you of how they helped you. Their relationships are conditional. When you have fulfilled your use, the sociopath discards you. You will be ghosted at the flip of a coin with zero conscience on their part.
The devastation in the lives of those they have used, the confusion & betrayal friends & lovers feel. I’ve had clients referred to counselling as they simply couldn’t understand how another human being could be so cruel. The reality of the aftermath, as the realisation it had all been a lie is heart breaking to witness.
Understandably, you become incredibly wary of other humans and are very careful of who you place your trust in.
Unfortunately, some continuously place their trust in the wrong people again & again. Failing to see that the common denominator here is themselves. Statements such as “I always end up getting used”, or “I attract the wrong kind of men”, are loaded with a victim mentality that is crippling to self realisation.
No is a full sentence.
That horrible feeling in your gut that something is wrong is 100% accurate.
Trust your vibes.

Kindness costs nothing. A kind word, a thoughtful act.
When someone performs a kindness for you, that has no agenda or thoughts of receiving- you are touched to the core.
All too often we are disappointed, as we have made the classic error of projecting our integrity on to those who do not possess it.

By setting healthy boundaries with everybody in our lives, really sorts the takers from the givers.
There’s an old saying:

Stop crossing oceans for those who wouldn’t cross a puddle for you!

For those of us who believe in Balance, are happy when our loved ones set boundaries. For when we do respect follows.
Setting boundaries with sociopath / narcissistic personality types you are likely to encounter a rage you’ve never witnessed before. They will have an adult tantrum & will literally throw their toys out of the cot.
How dare you set boundaries!
The cheek of you!
Have you no idea how long it took to select & groom you to my liking?
They will immediately try to Shame & guilt trip you into apologizing for YOUR BAD JUDGEMENT!!!!!!
You will be gas-lighted back into submission……sound familiar?
Since the odds are so high, chances Are most people reading this will have experienced an encounter with a sociopath at some point. One thing to remember is they cannot experience empathy in any way.
You need to remember the lesson they have taught you & get as far away from them as physically possible. They will never change. Oh and if you were thinking counselling would help…they will use the cognitive tools taught in therapy to manipulate to an even higher degree!!!!
You deserve love.
You deserve respect.
If you are sitting at a table where neither of these dishes are being served….leave the goddamn table!

©️Fiona Ní Mhuirri

Sent from my iPad

By Fiona Faery

12 December, 2018 11:55

Drugs affects every single class & walk of life. It does not discriminate. I’ve sat across countless family members whose lives have been torn apart by a loved one who is an addict. I’ve read for countless recovering addicts who literally take it one day at a time.
It can be so difficult to separate the disease of addiction from the addict. For addicts will sell anything that holds any value to score. Objects that hold massive sentimental value to a family are a quick source of cash to an addict. An addict will rob from their mother’s purse, lie, cheat & steal. The addiction takes hold and tunnel vision ensues…fixating on how they will get their next fix.
Debts begin to build with various dealers, black eyes are passed off as random encounters. At this point the erratic nature in the addicts personality rings alarm bells in family members. They lose weight and have lost all aspirations or concern for their appearance.
Entire friendship groups become riddled with joint addiction.
There is a dealer with a few yards of where you live right now. It is an epidemic. If you’re lucky enough not to have an immediate family member affected by it, I guarantee it will affect a relation.
The shame a mother feels when she finds out her son or daughter has an addiction. Her immediate reaction is to blame herself. If she could only of done something sooner or stopped it earlier.
It is not your fault.
An addict needs love as well as boundaries. Helplines such as drugs.ie provide helpful advice and can link you in to services.
Sadly, the services in this flailing health system are limited. Ultimately it falls back on the family to surround the addict with support.

In certain African tribes, when a baby is born… the tribe sings a unique song to that child. That song is sung at birthdays & celebrations, but also when the child commits offences against the tribe.
For it is only the tribe that can remind the child of their song that they may have forgotten.
Indeed it is the child that must accept responsibility for their recovery and embrace their destiny.
If you are reading this and are struggling to cope with a loved one that is in the chokehold of addiction , it is actions not words you need to believe, if they ask for help – listen. Know above anything else they cannot hear their song right know. Their soul is fragmented and you need to remind them of their potential. Protect yourself. An addict uses their intelligence to emotionally manipulate. Link in with services to help you. Nar-Anon & family support groups are there to offer support. You will meet many in the group who have lived your future. Get as much support that is available to you at this time.

An addict can not recover without the support of loved ones. Please know that inside that addict is your loved one struggling to remember their song, it’s times like this you need to remember your song and ask for help…..

©️Fiona Ní Mhuirri

By Fiona Faery

11 December, 2018 16:49

Despondency is defined as a loss of spirit or courage. Feeling disconnected from source. The light at the end of that tunnel has been switched off. Hope evaporates. People can let you down.
It is only natural to sink into despair. Our souls are weary from holding space for those that are not worthy. We literally feel as if the well has run dry & we literally have nothing left to give. A friend in the midst of this heaviness once said to me , “Fiona I’m so ready to go home to spirit, if I didn’t wake tomorrow I would be ok with that”. This person had absolutely no intention of taking their life for one second, they were verbalising how physically, emotions & spiritually exhausted they felt.
When you are despondent your energy is spent. Your motivation has left you.
Sometimes illness enters as you have spent so long pleasing everyone else & ignoring the warning signs your body had been sending you.
Your health that you once took for granted has now become your single greatest struggle. You find out who is there for you pretty fast, when you no longer have the strength or energy to people please. Those that leave you in your hour of need, are not your friends. This might be painful to hear but takers will always take. It’s not a two way source of exchange, hence your energy being consistently drained. If you have been projecting a sense of integrity on to those that lack this virtue, is it any wonder you are completely exhausted?
A rage can fill your body.
A pulsating, visceral destructive force that wants to lash out at the source of your pain. When you internalise anger, the body stores it & it will manifest as a form of dis-ease within the body. I’ve had countless amounts of client’s sit in front of me with mystery diagnosis where their bloods / x-rays / tests came back clear, yet they were physically ill. In most cases the client had endured some grief / heartbreak / trauma that had been repressed as they were too busy to deal with it at the time, only to manifest years later. Toxic pain can squat in your body like a toad & Spread its poisonous bile into your thoughts, hopes & dreams.
You start to become pessimistic, sarcastic & wary of people. You no longer believe in the goodness or kindness of strangers. Everybody has an angle or agenda. Sadly, that is what you will start to attract in your life, hence reinforcing your twisted belief system even further.
You need to distance yourself from the source of your pain. If it is family, go no contact to dissolve the raw emotion. If it is a child / teenager causing the issues contact the appropriate support systems & seek professional help.
It is time to stop running and listen to your body.
Destructive cycles of comfort eating / smoking / drinking / impulse buying / hoarding are the dysfunctional defence mechanisms that you revert to when trying to hide from yourself.
We can sink into victimhood with its twin sisters blame & Shame’s endless background commentary running inside our heads.
Happiness is a choice.
You have to fight for it.
When your body is heavy with sorrow & your soul is weary you need to be even more loving with yourself. It’s time to check in with yourself.
If you’ve suffered a betrayal and feel completely alone, know this time is transitory. It shall not last. You need time out to rebuild & restore the soul. You can’t do that with folks still pulling out of your energy.
You need to forgive yourself for putting up with so much crap for so long instead of ridiculing yourself at your “stupidity” for believing in intrinsic values of love, trust & respect. Remember the heart simply wants to be loved. You deserve to be loved. You deserve to be seen.
It’s time to make peace with yourself.
This graveyard of despair holds no solace for you. There is no comfort to be found clinging to the bones of old relationships, family or friends that have abandoned you. Cherish the good & learn from the bad.
Make plans.
Even if it’s simply making your bed and going for a walk. It’s a step toward self care that’s important.
Start to incorporate fun into your life. Play your music. Dance. Watch a favourite film. Reconnect with old friends. Take up a hobby & meet new people.
You will start to fill up inside once more. The more time you invest on yourself , the more the universe will find people & situations that will fill you up even more.
You need to let that shit go.
Now is as good a time as any……..

©Fiona Ní Mhuirri

By Fiona Faery

23 July, 2018 17:03

Gossip is juicy.It falsely elevates us to a social standing above the target in question. “I mean her windows haven’t been washed in over a month…..how can she see out of them!”
It’s intention is to direct scorn & shame upon an individual.
The valley of the squinting windows is alive and well today, and as a woman there is a hierarchy we are all too aware of in our local village/ town.
Gossip contains needles of spite.
True, you may be sick of the fact your Neighbour’s garden is in a hoop, but did you stop to think what’s going on with your neighbour? Has there been a recent bereavement, is there mental health issues? Sometimes it can be personal issues in someone’s life & the exterior mirrors the emotional chaos in your Neighbour’s life.
What if you offered to mow their lawn? Would the world fall off its’ axis? (And don’t use that as another opportunity to gossip ffs!)
Gossip has its uses. At a grassroots levels it raises awareness & keeps us connected to our communities. We are aware of the helpers as well as the bad apples so to speak.
At a toxic level, it can isolate & intimidate. An example of this were the Magdalene laundry’s where entire communities were complacent in the shaming & subsequent institutionalizing of so called “fallen” women.
The Salem witch trials fell foul under the fear & repression of being singled out as different from your community. We pass the blame from one to another, desperately trying to avoid the unforgiving gaze of our peers.
(Someone should be ringing a bell, shouting SHAME, SHAME, SHAME!)
Instead of standing up and saying,
You’re very pass remarkable….
I don’t pass on Gossip…
If I don’t hear it I can’t say it!
Gossip needs Oxegen. It cannot survive without a carrier. So in essence being an ‘innocent’ bystander makes you complicit. You are complicit in standing there while someone’s character is being slandered. In my opinion that’s makes you just as bad as the actual gossip. Next time you’re about to partake in the “who didn’t put there bins out today” rant or “her curtains are still drawn at 10 am” hiss…
Think about the energy you are redirecting toward yourself.
You passive aggressives are the worst. Smiling & offering help, then telling anyone who will listen how helpful you were…

He who gossips to you will gossip about you.

There is an old Buddhist story of two monks……
They had taken a vow of silence , celibacy (no contact whatsoever with women) & poverty. They lived a simple life & were on their way to a temple in another village to pay respects to a visiting holy man.
As they came to the outskirts of their village, there path was blocked by the river. The recent monsoon had raised the water levels, crossing it took skill & sure footedness.
There was a woman in distress at the banks, for she had tried and failed to cross several times.
One of the monks, without saying anything. Picked up the woman and carried her safely across to the other side, where he gently put her down & continued on his way to the monastery.
The other monk was furious.
They continued on in silence, but with each step the monk’s frustration grew until he could no longer stand it, he blurted out”
Why did you do it? You know we are forbidden to have any contact with women?”
The other monk looked at him and spoke” all I did was carry her to the other side, you’ve been carrying her ever since….”

To put it simply..

©️Fiona Ní Mhuirri

By Fiona Faery